"Magic Time"

I quit my insurance job to move to L.A. and be an actress, or a waitress? Something with  a “tress”...not a seamstress. The place where I am employed will need to remain anonymous from this point forward. They, along with certain religious groups in L.A. are everywhere. I really believe that. I’ll just say that  they are a factory of beautiful actors, writers, and musicians all dressed in white, like angels, delivering cakes made entirely of cheese to overweight-fork-already-in-hand-stuffed-with-brown-bread customers. Since, I am not mentioning the name, I have decided to call it the Factory of Unimaginable Negativity, or FUN, and from hear on out it will be FUN. 

On the night I saw Transformers II, opening night at 12:05 am, I was in the elevator to the Arclight on Sunset and I was recognized! I was so excited. Maybe they recognized me from doing 12 Corazones on Telemundo; or my late night informercial for Termafreeze (which mainly shot my hands and my pink polo shirt meeting my white FUN jeans). But no, the girl said after, “You were my server at FUN.” Yes, this is why I moved to L.A., to be recognized as a server. She actually seemed really respectful in that elevator ride and didn’t ask for ranch or change or anything. She just stared like she was seeing me in real life for the first time and no longer consumed with FUN. She looked at me with respect. 

Some of my customers...no that’s guests as we are to refer to them at FUN, gasp when I tell them I’m an actor. They look at me in horror and ask why?  But you’re such a sweet girl. It’s such an interview question. Why do you want this job? Because my whole life I’ve dreamed of working in all white, even when that thing happens once a month, and serving cake. Why do I want to be an actor? Why would I leave my major behind, insurance job behind, to come drive in traffic, work at FUN, and be an actor? 

I recently attended a workshop that reminded me why. It was hosted by John Stamos, his manager, his agent, the producer who brought back the musical starting with Chicago, and a television director. It was at a new theater that John Stamos had donated money to and I was in a room of people exactly like me. The first thing the manager said was we have the hardest, most competitive job in the world. The second thing he said was that all of us will never be in the same room again. Some of the group will continue going to workshops, some will work (not at FUN), and most, will go home. They all continued to talk about the business. John Stamos had this cool, relaxed confidence about him which reminded me almost exactly of family friend Russ Agee. The audience would ask questions and John and his posse would all chime in with answers from their various departments. 

They emphasized that we are all in this together, the people in the room, and who wouldn’t want to be in the business of being apart of dreams? They explained that “no” actually never means “no.” It means keep coming back, maybe for ten years...They were all such interesting looking characters. The manager was east coast and looked and dressed like the man who drove the Mule Shuttle at my college. (Our mascot was the Mules, a suitable mascot for D3) The agent was the only one in a full suit, he looked sharp. The producer and director were in blazers and tennis shoes. The agent said very little just the occasional “you’re fucked” response to doing anything wrong. The manager said you have to want this enough to sleep on a floor, while John Stamos chimes in, “or a producer.” 

But why do you want to be actors? The agent asked us. Because we can’t be anything else and be satisfied, this is it! We love it. John Stamos answered the question, “money.” The producer, said he started out as a production assistant on the set of Glen Gary Glen Ross. His job was to go get Jack Lemmon and walk him from his trailer to the set. He remembered when Jack Lemmon stepped out of his trailer he would always say, “magic time.” They reminded us it is a magic time where we get to fight the Brittish again (where our competition comes from), where no doesn’t mean no, where everyone gets a little lucky, where you will sit on a set for ten hours to play a character with an IQ thirty points lower than you, where grown ups still get together and read plays, and where people will work for copy, credit and or meals. Why do I want to be an actor? I want my magic time. 

Just remember, whenever there is magic time there has to be a little FUN.